Maybe the perfect motorcycle?
"A panty dropper" ??
http://clarksville.craigslist.org/mcy/4536315149.html
"A panty dropper" ??
http://clarksville.craigslist.org/mcy/4536315149.html
SalmoSam said:I like it. Will plagiarize it when I eventually sell my Tenere, with something like this:
Feast your eyes on the most badass Adventure motorcycle in the US of A. This panty dropper is a 2012 Super Duper Tenere with 50,000 ass kicking, goat path navigating, who-cares-if-the-asphalt-ends miles on it. This beast of a bike doesn't have sissy shiny chrome all over it that reflects the sun straight into your eyes so you lose your chance to flip off the image-obsessed “bad boy” hogs outside bars, or Arian-made ADV pretenders parked at a local Starbucks - who ignore you because they know they are on the bike that they think that you wish you could of had. Instead, this bike will not let you make friends with your local motorcycle mechanic, as you may very well never see him, unlike those others who have their mechanics designated as both heirs and godparents, due to their omnipresence in your life. This aftermarket armor-plated pack horse not only looks brutal but causes everyone who sees you on your bike to wish they had balls the size of yours to ride anywhere that you care to venture, instead of drinking Bud or latte’s and dreaming, and hadn't spent all their banker bunks on their expensive and over-priced high-maintenance delicate fragile mechanical flowers that cost triple the price of a real, modern, and function-over-superficial aesthetics mechanical marvels injected with bighorn blood. This Tenere also has an unsexy OEM seat that won’t have a chance to sore your ass as chances are you will be standing on the pegs, barreling across a ridge line, in areas so remote that any cell phone that you brought along might as well be used as a kickstand foot support pad. The seat comes with pillion and a carrying capacity that will allow you to not only carry the support crew (we don’t denigrate our soul mates as “bitches” because of our continual need to cover up our cerebral and physical shortcomings with continual imaginary machismo bravado), but an extra set of tires, a complete set of camping gear, additional -yet unneeded - parts, winch, the kitchen sink, and a plethora of all sorts of stuff we will probably not use – but take anyway just because we can and won’t even feel the load. This pillion works in conjunction with the pleasant sound emanating from pipes from the torquey and never-complaining crossplane inline twin that won’t drown out the passengers continuous “ooh’s” and “awe’s” and gasps in ecstasy about the scenery and places your ride will bring you to, so caught up in the experience that nary a word is uttered such as "my ass is hurting, can we take a break”, only to reward you in spades once the day’s riding is done and you are snuggly tucked into your conjoined sleeping bag. There are many other extras on the bike that are not suitable for craigslist, and if you've read some of the shit on craigslist then you know you are in for a ton of accessories, which you can well afford because you haven’t spent all your cash on image. ::022::
******MUST READ*********
If you are currently wearing black leather, have little visible skin through your confluent tattoos, rarely get below 0.8% BAC, have every piece of H-D or Beemer gear because you pride yourself as an anti-corporate individual, under 18 (mentally, not chronologically), never owned a functioning bike before, eat exclusively fried or grilled food with your “momma” , could stand in as an extra with little make-up for a Planet of the Apes movie, rarely wash your hair, need to mix a fine scotch with Coke, never remove your bandana or skull cap even at the Barber Shop, or any combination of the above, DO NOT WASTE MY TIME AND CONTACT ME. THIS BIKE IS TOO REAL AND MANLY FOR YOU!!!! ::26::